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October 05
October 28, 2005
Posted by: darksandal in Uncategorized | Permalink Comments
October 27, 2005
UPDATE: Apparently Mr. Therault got his facts less than straight. It’s actually the real estate co. that handles the property that threatened to evict camp casey because of zoning violations. See the comments for more.
Just got an email from Dave Therault that said that Colorado College, who owns the property where local video/music store Toons sits, has ordered Eric Verlo, owner of Toons, to demolish the local Camp Casey that’s been stationed in the parking lot of his business for two months now. If they don’t take the camp down, CC has said they’ll evict Toons and order his employees to take the camp down.
Please go to Toons and show your support for Verlo’s First Amendment rights to protest on property that he has legally and lawfully rented for, sheesh, is it 20 years now?
Here’s a link to Verlo’s Camp Case site and here’s the full text of the email:
Posted by: darksandal in Uncategorized | Permalink 5 Comments
October 25, 2005
Funny because we aren’t weekly! But thanks Dan. Here’s the link in which he mentions us and our old pal John Dicker too.
Posted by: darksandal in Uncategorized | Permalink 1 Comment
October 20, 2005
Oh finally, a year after The Toilet Paper started publishing in Colorado Springs, the local “alt”-weekly, The Indpendent actually mentioned us by name!.
That’s right folks. And not only did they mention us by name, they mentioned us in a review of Neil Swaab’s new collection of Mr. Wiggles, a revolting comic strip that runs every month in The Toilet Paper.
This is funny for many reasons, the first of which is that when I tried to review Neil Swaab’s previous collection of Mr. Wiggles when I was still at the Independent, my review was killed because Neil Swaab was just too disgusting.
This is also funny because the Independent has refused to acknowledge us for an entire year despite the fact we have been written up by The Colorado Springs Gazette (on more than one occasion), The Denver Westword, and linked to by national blogs such as Gawker, Defamer, Wonkette and The Revealer.
Must’ve been an oversight, or … maybe the Indy really is getting hipper. They have, after all, added the most boring advice column on the planet, Advice Goddess by Amy Alkon (the poor man’s Sandra Bernhard), not to mention their snazzy new expanded music section, which, gasp, includes a music gossip column.
Keep going, Indy. When you get to the point when you’re actually writing about things that make people give a shit again, you can legitimately pretend like it wasn’t The TP that reminded you that this town, unlike you, still has a soul.
Posted by: darksandal in Uncategorized | Permalink 2 Comments
October 7, 2005
The Paper Writing Wizard
written by T.S. Cardgage
Not long ago, Focus on the Family began making available what they refer to as a “letter writing wizard” intended for their supporters to use in “composing” letters to the editor, and which involved cutting and pasting selective portions of an already composed text. They have since argued that this is not plagiarism, but rather a tool for composition, because their supporters have Focus’ permission to use the material without attribution.
In this new spirit of a redefined plagiarism, I humbly offer this Paper Writing Wizard to all area high school students, containing excerpts culled from my own high school papers and representing some of the greatest heights of grammatical and technical proficiency I have yet attained. As you have my permission to use the tool without attribution, it cannot be considered plagiarism, at least not according to the FOTF definition. I make no warranties as regards the definition favored by your school’s administration.
The Paper Writing Wizard makes writing fun!
Here’s how it works:
1. First, select any primary title from the list of primary titles.
2. Second, select any secondary title from the secondary titles list to go after the colon. You can’t have a serious academic paper without a colon in the title.
3. Now, look over the five sections below. From each section, select desired sentences and copy them–feel free to modify the sections in your own words. The sentences provided have been mathematically calculated to provide thousands of variations, covering every subject likely to be assigned. No matter which sentences you choose, the result will be a finished paper that is bound to wow your teachers. Five paragraphs is the magical number necessary to write anything worthwhile.
4. Use the time you’ve saved to help out in your community.
5. Everybody wins!
Cuba:
The Old Man and the Sea:
Ernest Hemingway:
Fading Communist Empire:
An Historical Analysis
Imagery and Thematic Elements
A Distinctive Pastiche
An Ideology in Crisis
An Historical Analysis
Imagery and Thematic Elements
A Distinctive Pastiche
An Ideology in Crisis
The country of Cuba has always been a cunning foe of these United States of America. Under the tutelage of Fidel Castro, Cubans first attacked American interests in the Bay of Pigs invasion, a stunning defeat for the U.S. The Old Man and the Sea, by Ernest Hemingway, is a story about an ancient mariner and his struggles on the sea. Later, President John F. Kennedy said of Cuba, “if Cuba is not used for the export of aggressive Communist purposes, there will be peace in the Caribbean.”1 She was standing in front of me, her upper teeth biting the right corner of her lower lip, leaning slightly forward so that her already hypnosis-inducing breasts were pushed slightly more together, allowing a line of sight that showed bikini and cleavage on one end and light on the other, a tunnel of fleshy pleasure. Santiago, who stars as The Old Man, remembers how in his youth he could perform his various shipboard duties with ease, but is frustrated with the onset of age, and with it, feebleness. In his long-suffering struggle with a mighty shark, we see the timeless struggle of good versus evil that has ever plagued mankind. In this paper, I will explain the history of Cuba and why we must remain ever vigilant, lest Americans fall victim to these Communist swine.
Posted by: darksandal in Uncategorized | Permalink 1 Comment
October 6, 2005
Hello Boys and She-Males,
The September issue of the Toilet Paper is finally up online here. We apologize for the delays, but abnormal growth in the paper coupled with strained resources have left us scrambling to keep it together. Boo hoo.
If you want to see the current issues of the paper sooner and more blog posts, please subscribe!. It’s only $25 and you get yr. choice of a Church Kicker or a Church Whipper t-shirt with the sub. Unfortunately, if you don’t subscribe you’ll go to hell. (Hey, it works for the Christians).
Posted by: darksandal in Uncategorized | Permalink Comments
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