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December 06

December 31, 2006

Excellent Article on Rise and Fall of Evangelicalism In COS

Paul Asay has a pretty decent article recapping the Rise and Fall of Colorado Springs as the epicenter of evangelicalism in the US. Let’s hope he’s right.

Posted by: darksandal in Uncategorized | Permalink 2 Comments

December 29, 2006

Vote Mike Jones for Queer of the Year

HERE at joemygod.blogspot.com.

Posted by: darksandal in Haggard: Gay | Permalink Comments

December 29, 2006

A Gem from the first print edition of Newspeak

POLITICAL SCIENCE
By: Dr. Jasper Masterson, PhD, LASIK Surgery Pioneer

During a recent 60 Minutes telecast, Katie Couric interviewed Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice. There was a brief moment when Couric stopped grilling Rice on the important national issues of Rice’s alleged love life, her ability to play the piano and her impressive mastery of an elliptical exercise training apparatus to engage the first African American female Secretary of State on the issue of foreign policy. Rice eloquently equated the War on Terror to another battle that is just as close to her heart, the civil rights movement. Rice told Couric that growing up in Birmingham, Alabama at the height of racial tensions in the South shaped her perception of the battle between good and evil. On the morning of September 15, 1963, Rice lost four friends at the Sixteenth Street Baptist Church where Ku Klux Klan member Robert Edward Chambliss planted a bomb that took the young lives of Denise McNair, Addie Mae Collins, Carole Robertson, and Cynthia Wesley, all of whom were close in age to Rice at the time. Rice says that the darkness of humanity that perpetrated the loss of life on that day in 1963 is the same darkness of humanity that is endeavoring to destroy the freedom that we all hold so dear. Rice believes that her position on the War on Terror and its centerpiece, the war in Iraq is of the same spirit that catalyzed the civil rights movement in the 1960’s. Rice argues that the policies of the Bush administration are morally aligned with the philosophy of the civil rights leaders of the 1960’s, both locked in a battle with the darkness of humanity.

To help us understand this apparent contradiction, we must turn to science. As we thumb through the pages of scientific inquiry we travel to the year 1621 where 40-year old Dutch astronomer and mathematician Willebrord Snellius has just discovered the law of refraction which now bears his name, Snell’s Law of Refraction.

Snell’s law gives the relationship between the angles of incidence and refraction for a beam of light traveling between two mediums that have different refractive indices. For example, the refractive index of air, at standard temperature and pressure is 1.0002926 and the refractive index of glass is 1.5 to 1.54 while the refractive index of diamond is 2.419, ergo, light traveling from air to the medium of glass will be refracted or bent less than light traveling from air to the medium of diamond. The higher the refractive index of a medium, the more the light will be refracted.

Similarly, we can assign values for the Political Refractive Index of any given point in history. Political Refractivity experts assign a refractive index of 1.73 to the year 1963 and a refractive index of 3.98 to 2005 (the most recent year the Political Refractive Index was measured). If a beam of light labeled “Civil Rights Movement” travels from 1963 with a Political Refractive Index of 1.73 into present day with a refractive index of 3.98, the beam of light is refracted to such a degree that it is no longer recognized as “Civil Rights Movement” but as “War on Terror”.

Snell’s Law coupled with the science of Political Refractivity provides a simple method to gauge the progress of socio-political evolution. We can also use Snell’s Law as a framework of inquiry to illuminate the progression of political parties over the same period of time, as the following diagram illustrates.

You may note that the 2005 refractions are precariously close to achieving total internal reflection. Total internal reflection occurs when light is bent at a boundary enough to send it backwards, thereby reflecting all of the light. This is an important point to understand, as an increase in the Political Refractive Index over 2005 numbers, may result in the total internal reflection state. Using the above examples, once total internal reflection is achieved, the civil rights movement will be forever locked in a state of war on terror, 1963 Democrats will forever be Republicans and 1963 Republicans will never cease being Fascists.

Though Rice has Ph.D. in Political Science from the University of Denver, it is crucial to remember that Political Science is not real science, therefore Dr. Rice cannot be expected to understand the hypocrisy inherent in her position. It is only through real science, as exemplified here, that understanding and truth can be ascertained.

Posted by: darksandal in Science, Vast Phil Collins Conspiracy | Permalink Comments

December 29, 2006

In Case Brokeback Mountain Doesn’t Sound Gay Enough To You …

… The New Life Church Tag (youth) retreat will be held at Crooked Creek Ranch.

Crooked Creek Ranch is one of Young Life’s newest properties. You’ll be impressed withexcellent facilities, beautiful accommodations and personalized service. It is our goal that guests have a life-changing experience throughhigh adventure, excellent service, quiet time, fun challenges, friendships and the dynamic presentation of the Gospel in God’s awesome creation!

Posted by: darksandal in Brokeback, Haggard: Gay | Permalink 2 Comments

December 29, 2006

13 Things of 2006

I’m not really a fan of qualifiers where year-end lists are concerned, but I like year-end lists and predictions, so I’m just going to list 13 Things” of 2006 and how I think they’ll play out in 2007 just because. Please amend in comments.

1). TV was better than movies. Nothing even came close to Battlestar Gallactica. Not even Borat, which started as part of the Ali G Show. Added bonus: BSG was available for download on iTunes, making cable and the wait for DVD obsolete.

2007: More first episodes of TV shows will be released to iTunes for free to get viewers hooked. Viewers will contintue to choose whether to watch on TV or wait a day or two to get their fix commercial free for $1.99.

2). The old was new in package form. Netflix made it possible to watch entire series like Battlestar Gallactica the way you’d read a novel. I also caught up on Arrested Development, Six Feet Under, The Wire, Firefly and so forth. Trade paperback comics were the print equivalent: The Walking Dead, The Last Man are far better read in long binges than in month-to-month comic book format. Sadly, it’s starting to hurt the monthly comics industry, but … ? These shows and comics are far from new, but many are starting to prefer to wait months, even years, to digest it all at once.

2007: YouTube starts charging for premium content, and they (along with iTunes) start producing their own shows for on-demand. High-tone publishers, house broken by the likes of Ware and Clowes, start eyeing lower brow comics for pubication as “graphic novels.”

3). Crashing John Dicker’s wedding in Hawaii. A once-in-a-lifetime opportunity that involved way too many coincidences (such as his “secret location” being 5 minutes from the place we just happened to be staying). Ursen whipping pigeons with a long piece of kelp was an added bonus.

2007: Crashing John Dicker’s car.

4). Aaron Retka going on vacation, again and again and again and again for two weeks at a time. The final Great Redneck Hope tour. His sister’s wedding on St. Martin (or wherever that was). Minnesota in August! Hey everybody, I’ve gotta go to England and Paris for Xmas and New Year’s. Sorry.

2007: 3rd cousin having a month-long wedding in Paupua New Guinea in February that he “just can’t get out of”

5). Faggard.

2007: Dan Savage outed as straight by hot chicks who had sex with him in return for pot brownies.

6). An almost literal media circus. High Plains Messenger launched. Toilet Paper closed. High Plains Messenger turned non-profit. Bon Vivant launched. Newspeak launched. High Plains Messenger closed. Bon Vivant sold.

2007: Please, no more publications.

7). Slog. So what if it’s in Seattle, it’s one of the best blogs on the internet and you can skip the local crap if it doesn’t interest you. The Stranger is, as far as I can tell, the only alt-weekly in the country to have figured out why blogging is an alt’s best friend and do it with teeth, wit and style.

2007: Many more try and fail. Blogging wanes in popularity as shit blogs close and fall away. Good 2nd and 3rd tier blogs solidify niches and rise to prominence.

8). Watching Shortbus with my Mother.

2007: Reading Alan Moore’s Lost Girls with my mother.

9). Young curators take over Colorado Springs galleries and great art shows ensue. Rubbish was great, and all the new curators at the institutional mainstays portend better things to come.

2007: Better things to come.

10). Colbert’s Address to the White House Press Club Luncheon + Borat = satire and comedy’s triumph over reality.

2007: Comedy and satire triumph over death.

11). Senor Padraig’s posts during our liveblogging of the Oscar’s. We’re in discussions with him to join us again in 2007.

2007: Padraig returns to South Africa for spiritual counsel when liveblogging becomes too much pressure.

12). Jasper Masterson’s Political Science Column in the First Issue of Newspeak (reprinted in the post above).

2007: Jasper Masterson discovers the correlation between the Poincare Conjecture and the Democratic Victory in the 2006 mid-term elections.

13). Independent spreads “Best Of” out over two issues, names Budweiser “Best Beer,” hires former Gazette sports columnist to head our local “Smart Alternative.”

2007: “Best Of” spread out over four issues, Schmidt’s Gay named “Best Beer,” hires out-of-state consultant for $70,000 to tell them they need a blog.

Posted by: darksandal in Let's Win! | Permalink 3 Comments

December 29, 2006

The Queen, best film of 2006

Holy shit, did you guys see The Queen, the new Stephen Frears film? I realize I’m about three months late here, but I have to say that it’s the best film of 2006 —loved Borat, but it’s not even close, sorry Noel.

With all our freakish celebrity worship, I’m still quite delighted America never became part of the monarchy cult. Constitutional or not, the shit is a CULT. The best scenes in the film are Tony Blair (and his wife) going to meet her majesty and all the bullshit protocol that goes with being in "her presence." That and the way the royals talk about themselves and the press.

Here’s an interesting, if short, NPR interview with Helen Mirren. I love when she confesses that she "nailed" the queen’s walk, which she did. And that her parents hated the monarchy — they were commies, I believe — and that the only part she could’ve played that would be worse from their perspective would be the pope. I bet she could play a good pope.

Anyway, I’d be curious to see what people think is the best film of 2006. I didn’t see Short Bus yet, and I hear that’s pretty great. Oh, and I can’t wait for the Newspeak Live Blogging/Flogging of the Oscars. That was so much fun last year. And if anyone’s wondering, I still hate the movie Crash and am still furious it beat out Brokeback for best picture. Best afterschool special disguised as an art house film maybe… Paul Haggis, you need a pie in your face.

Hey Craig, get your JPEGs ready. Hey Noel, shutit.

If folks are home in the snow and need some random Netflix adds, may I suggest some depressing British cinema? Why yes, I think I will!

Saturday Night, Sunday Morning (young Albert Finney as a prickish factory prole, excellent use of the slang word "duck" (substitute it for "dawg" and impress your friends!)

This Sporting Life: Richard Harris, rugby, adultery, hot!

Billy Liar: Ok, this is not on Netflix, but if you can find it oh…oh…oh… one of my favorites. Julie Christie is…shwing!

Nuts in May, Mike Leigh never lets me down. Never. That said you’ve gotta be patient with this short made-for-TV gem as the opening is really slow. Masterpiece Theater slow. However, if you like cringe humor there’s a scene with two hippie campers forcing a stranger into a sing-a-long that is one of the most hilariously uncomfortable movie moments of all time. Watch this with someone who won’t eat white sugar.

Look Back in Anger: watch this with someone you feel conflicted about. My God, there’s some emotional violence in this mofo and goddam, Richard Burton is fanfuckingtastic. Think you’re relationship is fucked up? Alright, maybe it is but you’ll feel decidedly less alone after taking this in.

I’ve got more to recommend, but I’ve also got pancakes to make and snow to shovel. I figure this is a good start.

Posted by: johndicker in Mediacrity | Permalink 3 Comments

December 28, 2006

Inner Noble

Get yer Title get yer red hot Title right here, Find yer Inner Noble step right up!

so Arron what’s yours?
mine’s:
His Most Serene Highness Lord Atomic Elroy the Mad of Giggleswick under Table

Via ( WIT of Staircase)

Posted by: atomic elroy in Uncategorized | Permalink 4 Comments

December 28, 2006

A Perfect Toy for the Psychedelic Parent

Ursen got this amazing Quercetti Skyrail for Xmas and he and Marina put it together yesterday. It’s basically a suspension marble rollercoaster with differently weighted marbles so you have to learn how to adjust the suspension for speed and centrifugal force. That alone would be pretty great, but there’s also a motorized marble elevator and, best of all, all the rails and four of the marbles glow in the dark. So you turn out all the light, turn on the elevator and watch the lovely glow in the dark marbles zip around the glowing waves of rail for as long as your acid-damaged brain will allow.

Posted by: darksandal in Gay for ... | Permalink 1 Comment