November 08
Yesterday, I woke up at about 11:00 in the morning. I strolled over to my comfortable recliner, pulled up my laptop, and began the morning ritual (well, one of them). Cigarette, email, and then a run at all the morning polls and punditry. 538, RealClearPolitics, and yes, even Drudge.”Holy shit,” I thought. “Tomorrow’s the day.”
A feeling of dread crept into my belly. It was butterflies, anxiety, stress. Obama +7.6 according to RealClear, similar numbers from 538. Day-before projections had Obama competetive with McCain in Ohio, North Carolina, Missouri, and even Florida. Pennsylvania seemed all but locked, Obama boasting a 6 point lead. Why did I feel anxious?
I’m 23. I was 16 or so when Bush came into power. I was hardly politically aware even at 16, let alone at 12 when Clinton began his second term. I didn’t even really know what the difference between Clinton and Dole was, but at 16 I at least knew I slanted left. Even still, every presidential election I’ve ever really understoond in any meaningful way has gone the exact way I hoped it wouldn’t. Maybe it was the same feeling I used to get before I wrestled in a big match, a championship match. Anticipation of something spectacular?
Or maybe this is what winning feels like? All sorts of cold-feet things started to happen. “Maybe the polls have been off! Maybe McCain will squeak it out! What if he edges Obama in Florida AND Ohio? Holy shit, what will I do if McCain wins?” It stuck with me all day. I couldn’t escape it until 7 in the evening, when I was in the theater about to start rehearsal. Even after that, the butterflies returned.
It occurs to me that the answer is all and none of these things, and the answer is really the above question: “What will I do if McCain wins?” Well, the same thing I’ve been doing the entirety of my cogent life. Eight of the most formative years of my life have been spent knowing nothing but a Bush in office. What happens when that changes? What happens when someone I ideologically agree with has control? What happens when the Democrats have a big majority in Congress? What will I feel when I see American domestic and foreign policy shifting left for the first time in my life?
I’ve grown comfortable in the society we live in. I’m not fond of most conservative platforms and have no love for Bush or the GOP. Even still, it’s what I know–bitching and moaning about this problem or that one, this fucked up thing or what-have-you. I’ve spent more time worrying about Amendment 48 than any of the amendments I actually believe are good. Simply put, I’m comfortable with bitching about my government.
What do I do when I -like- my government, or at least think I might?
Tonight is going to be a historic day. Political scientists are going to slave over this election. Books about this election will sell like hotcakes. This is one of the most important, hyped, storied, and scrutinized presidential campaigns we will ever see. And for me, it will mark a very new chapter in my life, assuming Ohio and/or Florida go blue and Pennsylvania holds on. It will mark a day where one of the fundamental conditions of my life so far completely changes.
The future will be an interesting one for me, and for you.
Posted by: Greg Reilly in Election '08 | Permalink
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4 Responses to “Self-indulgent ramblings of a political nature.”
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In many ways, I feel the same way. This is my third presidential election process, and I’m not sure what to do with myself. I hope drinking at McCabe’s will calm the butterflies…
Nader 2000. Kerry 2004. Obama 2008. Third time’s the charm, right?
It’s our time.
Very nice. Maybe you can take some solace in–wait, you were a wrestler?–the fact that a massive win for the Democratic party tonight still means a seriously fucked-up government. And seriously fucked-up schools, economy, foreign relations, et al. Cheer up, Greg. You will still be able to bitch tomorrow! (Albeit with a little more spring in your step, let’s hope. GO OBAMA!!)
Yeah, I wrestled. Was pretty damn good, too.
And yeah, I know things are still going to be fucked. Just, you know, maybe not quite as fucked?