Church Kicker

The Lost Sculpture Puncher

Somehow this one got left out of the earlier grouping -- a critical oversight on our part for which we apologize.

Thurston Moore in Church Kicker Couture

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July Church Kicker Preview

You have no idea.

Sculpture Puncher!

While the Church Kicker was in rehab, we called in the Sculpture Puncher to kick some arts's asses real bad in downtown Colorado Springs.

SCUM/Refuse Kicks Their Own Church

The Refuse/SCUM Church kicked their own Church! This photo courtesy of Rence.

Ugly Churches

From the May issue of The Toilet Paper

Certainly all the churches pictured here deserve to be kicked for countless reasons, but we decided to do our kick these churches on purely aesthetical grounds. These are just a just a few of the butt-ugly, strip-mall/warehouse/former-movie-theater variety of churches that litter Colorado Springs. The pre-Vatican II Catholics had it goin’ on for centuries where architectural awesomity was concerned. Even if you didn’t buy all the Jesus crap, you could still marvel at the spectacular art and artifice your hard-earned tithe had built and feel good knowing it went toward something far greater than cinderblock. The Episcopals did OK where the whole “humble gothic” look was concerned, but the further you get from Rome (in proximity and schisms), the crappier the churches look. And by the time you get to Academy Blvd. in Colorado Springs you’ve reached the zenith of Chritian aesthetic devolution. I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before Wal-Mart builds in-store chapels. James Beck: you promised me you were going to kick Church’s Fried Chicken with a drumstick in your hand and I’m still waiting! Send your Church Kicker photos and captions to churchkicker@toiletpaperonline.com.