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June 05, 2008

Two things to relate on this stormy morning

First, a dash of irony: As I was driving to work, I noticed one of those sweet little Smart cars. As I pulled alongside this wonder of fuel efficiency, I noticed it was occupied and driven by a lone woman who was talking on her cell phone. As she held the phone in one hand and made emphatic gestures with the other, barely manipulating the steering wheel, I realized that this was my Thursday morning "moment of Zen": A Smart car with a (somewhat) stupid operator. Hands free kit, people!

Also, this article on the totally bitchin' drug trafficking culture of the Mexican Sierra Madres can be summarized neatly with this quote: "The largest component of Mexico's economy is still drug trafficking, estimated at about $50bn. According to a leaked study conducted in 2001 by Mexico's internal security agency CISEN, if the drug business was somehow wiped out, Mexico's economy would shrink by 63 per cent."

Like I said, totally bitchin'.

May 14, 2008

Farewell Reading at Edifice Gallery Tomorrow Night

Just a reminder that Marina and I will be reading tomorrow night at Edifice Gallery as part of the the Third Thursday poetry night. I'm going to read a few poems from my latest, In the City of Word People, and the first chapter of my novel set in Colorado Springs ...


The event begins at 7:30 p.m. and usually goes until 10:30 or so. Hope to see you there.

April 22, 2008

LOLbruce des Tages.

Dbpix2_copy

Story here.

March 21, 2008

Wait! I've got a better one!

It's the LOLCat Bible Translation Project, one of the best ideas since ever.

In the beginning:

Boreded Ceiling Cat makinkgz Urf n stuffs

Oh hai. In teh beginnin Ceiling Cat maded teh skiez An da Urfs, but he did not eated dem. Da Urfs no had shapez An haded dark face, An Ceiling Cat rode invisible bike over teh waterz. At start, no has lyte. An Ceiling Cat sayz, i can haz lite? An lite wuz. An Ceiling Cat sawed teh lite, to seez stuffs, An splitted teh lite from dark but taht wuz ok cuz kittehs can see in teh dark An not tripz over nethin. An Ceiling Cat sayed light Day An dark no Day. It were FURST!!!1 An Ceiling Cat sayed, im in ur waterz makin a ceiling. But he no yet make a ur. An he maded a hole in teh Ceiling. An Ceiling Cat doed teh skiez with waterz down An waterz up. It happen. An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has teh firmmint wich iz funny bibel naim 4 ceiling, so wuz teh twoth day.

An Ceiling Cat gotted all teh waterz in ur base, An Ceiling Cat hadz dry placez cuz kittehs DO NOT WANT get wet. An Ceiling Cat called no waterz urth and waters oshun. Iz good. An Ceiling Cat sayed, DO WANT grass! so tehr wuz seedz An stufs, An fruitzors An vegbatels. An a Corm. It happen. An Ceiling Cat sawed that weedz ish good, so, letz there be weedz. An so teh threeth day jazzhands. An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has lightz in the skiez for splittin day An no day. It happen, lights everwear, like christmass, srsly. An Ceiling Cat doeth two grate lightz, teh most big for day, teh other for no day. An Ceiling Cat screw tehm on skiez, with big nails An stuff, to lite teh Urfs. An tehy rulez day An night. Ceiling Cat sawed. Iz good. An so teh furth day w00t.

An Ceiling Cat sayed, waterz bring me phishes, An burds, so kittehs can eat dem. But Ceiling Cat no eated dem. An Ceiling Cat maed big fishies An see monstrs, which wuz like big cows, except they no mood, An other stuffs dat mooves, An Ceiling Cat sawed iz good. An Ceiling Cat sed O hai, make bebehs kthx. An dont worry i wont watch u secksy, i not that kynd uf kitteh. An so teh...fith day. Ceiling Cat taek a wile 2 cawnt.
An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has MOAR living stuff, mooes, An creepie tings, An otehr aminals. It happen so tehre. An Ceiling Cat doed moar living stuff, mooes, An creepies, An otehr animuls, An did not eated tehm. An Ceiling Cat sayed, letz us do peeps like uz, becuz we ish teh qte, An let min p0wnz0r becuz tehy has can openers.

So Ceiling Cat createded teh peeps taht waz like him, can has can openers he maed tehm, min An womin wuz maeded, but he did not eated tehm. An Ceiling Cat sed them O hai maek bebehs kthx, An p0wn teh waterz, no waterz An teh firmmint, An evry stufs.

An Ceiling Cat sayed, Beholdt, the Urfs, I has it, An I has not eated it. For evry createded stufs tehre are the fuudz, to the burdies, teh creepiez, An teh mooes, so tehre. It happen. Iz good. An Ceiling Cat sayed, Beholdt, teh good enouf for releaze as version 0.8a. kthxbai.



Brilliant.

January 16, 2008

Hee.

The blogosphere and print media are aflutter today talking about our good friend Doug Bruce, the main benefit of which is that all parties involved—and this doesn't except us—are made to look like meta-douchetards.

My favorite is yesterday's Gazette op-ed, which clumsily invokes Britney Spears:

Douglas Bruce seems a lot like Britney Spears these days. Like Spears, Bruce seems to self-destruct in the spotlight. Bruce and Britney have issues with photographers. Britney chose to date an obtrusive cameraman; Bruce chose to kick one.

Sure, Bruce authored a useful, if somewhat flawed, constitutional amendment long ago that mostly empowers Colorado taxpayers and saves them money. For that, we give him credit. Likewise, there was a time when Britney was known for her work. She gave us “Oops I Did it Again.” For that, we give credit where credit is due.

Like Spears, Bruce has morphed into an embarrassment to himself and all his old friends. Unlike Bruce, Spears has an excuse: She’s practically a child, whose maturity was likely stilted by the turmoil of teen stardom. Bruce, by contrast, is a grown and educated man — one entrusted by leading Republicans with representing a district and making it look good.

Oh, and also like Britney Spears, Doug Bruce is fat! And, er, breathes oxygen! And what's that show you kids like to watch? American Idols? He's also like that! And that Guitar-Player Hero game, too—he's like that because you push his buttons! Get it? I am in the "house" with my pop-culture "rizzeferences"! Yeah, boyee!

Anyway, Dan Whipple has a piece up at Colorado Confidential comparing Bruce to Dennis Rodman and everybody's reporting the GOP response, which has been stern but somehow fond of the ol' TABOR-maker.

And how do we weigh in? With another adorable loldoug!

Bruce11

We are nothing if not high-minded.

January 15, 2008

We honor you, Doug Bruce ...

... for refusing to be cowed by Denver politics, being obstinate about taking your oath of office, getting reprimanded by other Republicans—and then kicking a photographer. You're representing us, baby, and we're happy knowing that COS is being guarded by a portly, batshit saint like you.

Please accept this image as our congratulations on your first day in office.

12004148370bruce_copy

xoxo,

Newspeak

January 09, 2008

LOL Cats go geek

Yeah, I know I'm about six months late to this...

20080108geekslolcats

November 28, 2007

Because it's been too long ...

November 05, 2007

Speaking of Violent Radicalization

This lolFawkes image was on the Guy Fawkes Wikipedia page today. Remember, remember!

October 10, 2007

I'm really sorry. I just had to.

128340601289062500leavebritney