The marriage life is beautiful, but it is also filled with numerous quarrels that are increasingly culminating in divorce. However, with expert advice, you can prevent any problems and enjoy the love and happiness. So, you may need a marriage counsellor for that kind of situation.
When husband and wife are ready to assume responsibility for their role in marital relations, that is, compassion, respecting others’ needs – they will be able to accomplish them through active listening and confirmation to understand the meaning of partner’s messages. In order to succeed, they should clearly express what they think and expect the same thing from their partner. Fusion Events toronto is the right place for people looking for an event planner in the Toronto area.
In couples who argue and mutually blame each other, it is typical that they disagree with who is responsible for what.
Instead of furious competition over who is right, the partners should learn the skills of achieving emotional calmness and “active listening.” They develop their compassion for understanding and recognizing needs and feelings, which is the basis of what is said.
One of the helpful ways to prevent a quarrel started or stop the discussion of disagreements, which could turn into a quarrel – is the application of the “viewing” technique. If one partner makes a remark, the other repeats the way he/ she understood it, trying to understand not only thoughts but also feelings. One of the partners tries to mirror the other. This checks your understanding and alignment with your partner’s feelings. In addition, the use of “active listening” helps couples stay on what is said by a remark that relates to behavior assessment, rather than switching to personal attacks.
When couples train to contact a partner, in addition to listening actively, and the language of nonviolent communication – then the possibilities for starting a quarrel are further reduced. For example, instead of yelling at your husband when he comes home late from their work, a woman should welcome him at the door, instead of calling him a fool who does not respect her and her efforts – which is the most common reason to start a quarrel. Instead, you can say I waited for you to eat together, and you did not tell me you’re going to be late, I’m offended and angry. It would’ve been better if you called me and said you’re going to be late.” Such a conversation prevents the beginning of a dispute, which occurs when partners are offended by insults, or the use of numerous forms of defense – apologize, non-acceptance of responsibility, counter-attack by similar remarks.
Disclosure in communication and appreciation of differences in attitudes, especially if you show your partner that you can understand his view – although you may not agree with him, is an effective way to prevent a quarrel. In addition, you need to be prepared to apologize when you find that you are wrong.